I Cannot Live Like This

Went down to expo today for a career choice fair. wat a scam... cheat my feelings.
the website indicated a lot of industry players present at the fair and all...
in the end.. the fair only took up half a hall, about 1/3 of it was the police, scdf and moe.
another half of the exhibitors were selling motivational books, some education group promoting their courses, and the rest were mostly insurance groups looking for ppl to join their team to sell the company's products.

on a sadder note...
i cannot live like this anymore... the torture is killing.
she may enjoy her new found freedom (not to be meant in a bad way), she may be having a ball of a time, but i'm not.
i'm almost practically living in misery thinking of her, missing her and wondering why the hell do i have to wait for 2 months. from the way i look at it, i will not have the answer even after 2 months.

i really duno wat to do for my next career. i KNOW I dun wana do sales, coz i know i'm not aggressive enough to earn big money from dat. i i KNOW i dun wana insurance, reasons being the same as sales.
i KNOW i will like the challenge of the hotel industry and will like to give it a shot. i KNOW i wana try teaching but i cant wait until sept for a school to call me.

so now wat? i'm thinking of doing an internship with a hotel. ritz carlton hopefully. den by the end of it, i hope to be able to gauge if i wana do it full time. if it doesn't work out, it's on to teaching then.
how's dat for a plan?

read from hecate, which was linked from mr brown (yes, i'm a blogder(= blog reader)), about the sweetest conversation she overheard between her parents:

Basically my dad confessed that throughout their 23 years of marriage, he has never really given my mom a good life. Yet my mom, upon hearing this, just said that she doesn't mind, and that she has been there with him through the good and bad times, and that whatever they have, be it good or bad, its always shared between the two of them, and that she never regret her decision to marry him.

makes me wonder if this will ever happen to me... duno if things will work out if i know for sure cannot lead a very good comfortable life.

think this is really getting to me liao... guess i could last 2 weeks...
think 3 is too much for me...
guess i really must love her a lot...
is there ever too much?